I don't know where this is coming from, but just bare with me. I know that some people think that I am plain dumb. I am the typical dumb "blonde" (even though I hide it behind hair dye) that everyone pokes fun at and who everyone can jsut walk all over. Not all, but some people do not really know me. They do not understand that I can be intelligant when I want, and that I have my own opinions and feelings. Yes, I will admit I do some pretty stupid stuff and I say some pretty stupid stuff, but doesn't everyone. I just go along with it because I like to laugh at myself and not take things seriously. But sometimes it gets to be too much. People seem to think "Oh Jenn won't care", when really I do. I don't know how this all started. I think it was a couple weeks ago when this guy (who will remain nameless) was being a jerk. I was just talking with my friends goofin off because, that's what I do. I said something dumb but I was not serious, and this guy was like "Wow. No wonder you're going to MalU, I thought you were somewhat smart." That got me thinking. Maybe, I let people walk all over me too much. I do not want to be a bitch but I do not want to be a push-over. The truth is, is that I don't care enough to get invovled with alot of shit. I'm layed-back, sorry if that is a sin. I'm just tired of people assuming that I am dumb and ignorant. Yes, I'm a goof, but I like to have fun. Sorry if thats a sin too. Just because I like to have fun does not been I do not have anything intelligant to say, or any constructive critisim. And for all you who care, it is not that I'm too dumb to get into any big University, its just that I don't see a point. Why go to a huge university when you can stay at home, go to an equally good school, save up for a year or two, and pay half of the tution then you would at the other schools? You can always transfer school after a year, so really I do not see a point.
Another thing, everytime we go visit family there is a certain famiyl member who always makes me feel like shit about myself. This person always brings up the fact that their son is going to UVic and is becoming a lawyer and is getting a B in Math 12. This person also brings up how I'm a slacker because I did not take Math, Calculus, or Physics. Why the fuck do they care? Im not their child. The main reason is to make me look like a failure to the rest of my family and mainly to myself. I hate to say it, but it is working. I am at a total loss. I have no clue what I want to do after school and now that seems like a bad thing. Because of this person, I feel like complete and utter shit. I just want to get out on my own and away from that part of my family.
The only great things in my life are my friends. Dan, Kate, Ashley, Amy, Alana, and everyone else who may read this, I don't know what I would do without you. haha I know I say that a lot, but its true.